Moist, sensual, mouth-watering, orgasmic - we could just as easily be describing a decadent chocolate cake as a session in the bedroom. Food and sex are just about the two greatest sensory delights we can experience. Separately they can be mind-blowing, so as pleasure-seeking creatures, it’s only natural we’re tempted to pair them.
Here’s how to incorporate food into your sex life without making a mess of it - figuratively speaking.
Use food as foreplay
They say the way to the heart is through the stomach. Well, so is the route to the bedroom. Certain foods, including the classics - oysters, dark chocolate, champagne - as well as lesser known aphrodisiacs, such as artichokes (which were actually considered scandalous in the 16th century for this very reason, and deemed unsuitable for consumption by women) are known to stimulate the senses and increase sexual desire. Not only is it a turn on when someone takes the time to make you a snack, these little treats can actually get you going.
Feed your partner
Feeding your partner can make for great foreplay. Try using a blindfold when tantalising your partner. Depriving them of the sense of sight can heighten the sexual tension and enliven their other senses (smell, taste, touch and sound). Consider teasing them with the smell of their favourite treat, offer them a taste, and leave them wanting more. You can also use food to enhance role-play, like giving an apple to your teacher, or hand-feeding a bunch of grapes to your Grecian God.
Lap it up
Chances are if you've moved to the bedroom there is probably already plenty of tonguing going on, but you can take this a step further. Consider drizzling something sweet over your partner's body, and be creative in the clean up.
Play with temperature
A cool way to add another dimension into your intimate encounter is by experimenting with temperature. For example, drag an ice cube along your partner’s bare skin to excite goosebumps. Or, hold one in your mouth while you perform oral sex. The shock of the coldness of your tongue against the warmth of your partner’s skin can heighten your partner's sensations.
If you're keen to heat things up, feel free to introduce warm food (syrup or melted chocolate, for example) into the mix. Just make sure you check the temperature first. There's nothing sexy about sustaining a second-degree burn.
Be food-safe
As always, when adding a new element into the bedroom there are a few things to keep in mind.
Much like its position at the point of the food pyramid, sugar has a specific and limited place in the bedroom. If you are playing with sweet foods, be sure to keep them away from the vagina. Sugary foods, and those that contain yeast (beer or yoghurt, for example) can upset the delicate pH balance of the vagina, leading to a yeast infection, bacterial overgrowth or discomfort.
Another thing. As you rummage through the fruit bowl and the veggie crisper, the shape and size of the produce might tempt you to Macgyver an impromptu dildo. Inserting any fresh produce into any orifices other than your mouth - at least without washing it thoroughly and putting a condom over it first - is a recipe for disaster. As well as having the potential to introduce dirt and bacteria where they don't belong, these makeshift sex toys are not designed with the safety of your body in mind. (A cucumber, for example, does not have a flared base like a butt plug.) In other words, don't make friends with salad.
We’re all for spicing things up, but don’t lose sight of your common sense. Intensely salty and spicy foods can damage the skin barrier of your delicate areas and cause irritation. Finally, don't forget to ask your partner if they have any food allergies. An epipen is not the kind of third party you want to be bringing into the bedroom.
With all of the above in mind, order up! Let your taste buds lead you and your partner into another sexual dimension. Just lay out a towel to catch the crumbs first.
Bon appetit!